I put him in jail bc I swear he talked without batteries once
LET ME FUCKIN TELL YOU SOMETHING ABOUT SOME FERBIES. MY COUSIN AND I HAD HEARD SOME CRAZY ASS RUMORS THAT THESE FUCKERS DID SHIT WITHOUT BATTERIES SO WE DECIDED HEY LETS TEST THIS SHIT. WE WERE FUCKING HOME ALONE RIGHT AND WE LOCKED THIS FUCKER IN A STEEL BOX WITH NO BATTERIES. WE BOTH WENT OUTSIDE, LOCKED THE DOORS AND WE CAME BACK AND THAT FUCKING THING WAS OUT OF THE BOX AND WAS FUCKING TALKING AND SHIT WE BURNED THAT FUCKER WITHIN LIKE FIVE FUCKIN MINUTES.
Moral of the story: DONT BUY FUCKING FURBIES
FOR REAL GUYS THIS IS NO FUCKING JOKE
THESE FUCKERS WILL CONTINUE TO TALK AND MOVE EVEN WITHOUT THE FUCKING BATTERIES
THEY’RE TERRIFYING AS SHIT AND THEY’RE OUT TO PUT AN END TO THE HUMAN RACE
DON’T FUCKING BUY FURBIES
DONT BUY THEM OH MY GOD. LAST YEAR I WORKED AT TOYS ‘R US AROUND THE TIME THE NEW LINE OF THOSE FUCKERS CAME OUT. THEY SOLD OUT WITHIN A WEEK. NOTHING WEIRD HAPPENED BUT THEN A LADY RETURNED ONE CAUSE SHE SAID IT WOULDNT TURN OFF. WE TOOK IT BACK AND SINCE IT WAS “BROKEN” WE KEPT IT IN OUR STAFF ROOM. THEN I WAS IN THERE ALONE AND IT WAS SITTING ON THE TABLE WITH NO BATTERIES IN IT. THEN THE FUCKING FERBIE STARTED MAKING NOISE THAT DIDNT SOUND LIKE WHAT FURBIEA SHOULD SOUND LIKE. IT WAS LIKE DEMONIC SCREECHING. I PUT THE LITTLE SHIT IN AN EMPTY LOCKER AND WHEN I TOLD MY MANAGER HE PUT IT IN THE BROKEN TOY BIN.
THEN I WENT OUT TO WORK AGAIN AND WHEN I CAME INTO THE STAFF ROOM AFTER MY SHIFT, THE FURBIE WAS ON THE TABLE AGAIN. YEAH DONT BUY THOSE FUCKERS
I HAVE MY OWN STORY TO ADD. I ONCE HAD A FURBIE, BUT ONCE IT DIED WE NEVER REPLACED THE BATTERIES AND JUST LET IT LAY DORMANT FOR A WHILE. MY COUSIN (WHO MIGHT I ADD, WAS A 22 YEAR OLD MAN AT THAT TIME) WAS HOUSESITTING FOR US AND THE FURBIE WAS TUCKED AWAY ON A SHELF IN OUR CELLAR. HE WENT DOWN TO GO DO SOME LAUNDRY AND THAT LITTLE SHIT OPENED ITS EYES AND MUTTERED “PEEKABOO”. MY COUSIN ATTACKED IT AND THREW IT OUTSIDE, AND IT WAS LATER TOSSED IN THE DUMPSTER. IM STILL AFRAID THAT THIS FURBIE WILL COME BACK TO HAUNT ME. DO NOT BUY THESE THEY ARE FUCKING DEMENTED!!!!
OKAY STORY TIME SO LAST CHRISTMAS MY COUSIN GOT ONE OF THESE FUCKERS EXCEPT IT WAS ONE OF THE NEW ELECTRONIC ONES AND THOSE ARE JUST AS BAD. THE BATTERIES ARE SEALED IN WITH SCREWS, AND NO ONE HAD A SCREWDRIVER THAT FIT, SO WE WERE FORCED TO DEAL WITH THIS THING THE WHOLE TIME. THE PROBLEM IS THAT THE DAMN THING WILL GO TO ‘SLEEP’, BUT ANY SORT OF MOVEMENT WILL WAKE IT UP AND CAUSE IT TO DEMONICALLY LAUGH. ANOTHER COUSIN GOT UP FOR A GLASS OF WATER AT TWO IN THE MORNING THAT NIGHT, WALKED BY THE CLOSET WHERE WE’D SHOVED IT IN FEAR, AND HIS FOOTSTEPS WOKE THE FUCKING THING UP AND IT STARTED LAUGHING AND WOULDN’T STOP FOR THE NEXT HOUR. DON’T BUY THESE FUCKING THINGS. THEY’RE DEMONIC.
the amount of personal stories is alarming
OK BUT MY MOM GOT US FURBIES AS LITTLE KIDS, AND YOU KNOW HOW THESE FUCKERS TALK BASED ON HOW YOU TRAIN THEM? WELL THE FACTORY GUYS THOUGHT IT WOULD BE FUNNY TO ONLY SWEAR AT THEM AND WHEN WE OPENED THEM CHRISTMAS MORNING THEY STARTED SPEWING PROFANITY AND DIDNT STOP UNTIL MY MOM RETURNED THEM
BACK WHEN I WAS LITTLE MY FURBIE WAS HUNGRY BUT WHEN I “FED” IT IT SAID IT WASN’T HUNGRY, AND WOULD THEN COMPLAIN IT WAS HUNGRY AGAIN. SINCE IT WOULDN’T STOP TALKING MY SISTER HIT IT WITH A BOOK AND IT JUST STOPPED MID SENTENCE, OPENED ITS EYES WIDE, AND LET OUT A BLOOD CURDLING SCREAM. WE TOOK OUT THE BATTERIES AND PUT IT IN THE GARAGE BUT IT WOULDN’T STOP SCREAMING EVEN WHEN WE STARTED TO TAKE IT APART. IT CONTINUED SCREAMING AS WE THREW IT IN THE TRASH AND THEN PUT IT IN THE DUMPSTER
in history my teacher was talking about the greeks and how they didnt call themselves greeks and called themselves “hellas” instead and i couldnt stop laughing because of the idea of greek people saying “we’re hella” what has the internet done to me
harry potter is adopted by sirius
Orphan is the New Black
Orlando Bloom’s character replaces Johnny Depp’s (did that actually happen?) as captain of the ship
Orphan is the new Jack
You know when you’re drowning, you don’t actually inhale until right before you black out. It’s called voluntary apnea. It’s like no matter how much you’re freaking out, the instinct to not let any water in is so strong that you won’t open your mouth until you feel like your head’s exploding. But then when you finally do let it in, that’s when it stops hurting. It’s not scary anymore. It’s… it’s actually kind of peaceful.
Baby sea turtle swimming
or is it flying through the snow
Definitely flying through the snow.